


Ways Vic Says "I Love You"

by nevercomestheday



Series: Ways _____ Says "I Love You" [2]
Category: Reservoir Dogs (1992)
Genre: (in the beginning), (the list items are second person and the scenes are third), Boundaries, Canon Compliant, Canon-Typical Violence, Domestic, Domestic Fluff, Drinking, Drunkenness, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, High School, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Underage Drinking, Letters, Lists, M/M, Making Out, Moving In Together, POV Alternating, POV Second Person, POV Third Person, Pre-Canon, Prison, Protectiveness, Shoplifting, Smoking, Some Humor, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-21
Updated: 2016-01-21
Packaged: 2018-05-15 10:05:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 32
Words: 7,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5781943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nevercomestheday/pseuds/nevercomestheday
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A list of ways Vic tells Eddie he loves him, without actually telling him he loves him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> READ THE EDDIE ONE FIRST (http://archiveofourown.org/works/5781505/chapters/13324756)! I wrote this one second!
> 
> ALSO- yes, there will be (or is, if you're from the future) a Creamsicle one too. I just wound up writing the TB one first. <3 Hope you enjoy!  
> Characters belong to Quentin Tarantino.

**only teases you when he knows you can take it**

_ Vic leans against the back wall of the school, tossing a little beanbag back and forth with Eddie. _

_ “So, uh, Vic… Valentine’s Day is this Friday.” Eddie bites his bottom lip and looks down at the ground. _

_ Vic scoffs. “Come on, Eddie, you don’t wanna fuckin’-” He stops short when he sees Eddie’s eyes. “Uh, yeah, guess it is.” _

_ Eddie looks up. “You wanna watch a few bad movies and get hammered? We can get a box of donuts.” _

_ Another urge to take the piss out of Eddie gets swallowed down at the sight of his vulnerable face, and Vic nods. “Sure.” _


	2. Chapter 2

**respects your father, even tries to impress him**

_ Eddie’s never seen Vic actually care about what anyone thinks of him. Normally he gives the world the finger, but something about Joe makes Vic act respectfully. When he knows he’s going to Eddie’s, he makes sure to look at least somewhat presentable if he knows Joe is home. _

_ One day, in the middle of making out, Vic pulls away, unusually pensive. _

_ “What’s up?” Eddie says, slightly out of breath. _

_ “Does your dad like me?” Vic asks. _

_ An incredulous look washes over Eddie. “Vic. Are you fuckin’ kidding me? I’ve got my tongue in your fuckin’ mouth and you’re asking me about my dad?” _

_ “Just, does he fuckin’ like me or not?”  _

_ Eddie sighs. “Yes. He’d tell you straight out if he didn’t.” _

_ Vic looks satisfied, and the rest of the night, the thought plagues Eddie. Why does Vic care so much if Joe likes him?  _

_ Eventually Eddie decides it must be because Joe is his father, and Vic wants to get in good with his family.  _

_ It’s not the only explanation that makes sense, but it’s the only one that makes Eddie feel good, so he picks that one and goes back to kissing the hell out of Vic. _


	3. Chapter 3

**takes your advice, though he’s too proud to admit it**

_ Vic’s grades are slipping, and though he doesn’t say a word, Eddie knows. When they leave class one afternoon, Vic is pulled aside by the teacher, and Eddie just waits patiently in the doorway. _

_ He overhears something about Vic needing to come in after school or he’ll be flunked, and when Vic shuffles back over to Eddie, he knows he has to say something. _

_ “This shit with the teacher, man, that sucks,” he starts. _

_ “Yeah. Motherfucker wants me to come in after school or I’ll fuckin’ fail.” Vic spits on the ground as they walk down the hall.  _

_ Eddie puts a hand on his shoulder. “Hey, look, I can help you if you want.” _

_ “I don’t need no fuckin’ help, Eddie,” Vic mutters. _

_ “Well, you can’t fuckin’ flunk out, man. Just… go in tomorrow.”  _

_ Vic scoffs and shakes his head, but the next day, when Eddie goes to leave class, he sees Vic hang back. _

_ He smiles and walks out, but sits on the hood of his car and smokes until Vic comes out. _


	4. Chapter 4

**steals Milky Ways from the local convenience store for you two to share**

_ Eddie loves candy, and Vic has always been able to remember that. He’s not good at remembering the specific things Eddie’s said he likes, but he knows they both like Milky Way bars, so on one of their many Saturdays together, before walking to Eddie’s, Vic stops by the 7-11 and shoves as many as he can into his pockets. _

_ He’s gotten so good at stealing little things like candy bars that he even says hello to the clerk before strolling back out of the store. _

_ He gets to Eddie’s place and pulls out the six candy bars one at a time. _

_ “Damn, Vic, you shouldn’t have!” Eddie beams. He tears into the first bar before the others even hit the table. _

_ “I guess I’m just the fuckin’ best then, ah?” Vic laughs. _

_ “The absolute fuckin’ best,” Eddie chuckles. He kisses Vic’s temple, and when he pulls back he finds a little mark of melted chocolate on Vic’s skin. He wipes it with the pad of his thumb and licks it, still smiling wide at Vic. _

_ Vic grabs Eddie by the shoulders and pulls him in for a real kiss, and before long, they’re both covered in chocolate. _


	5. Chapter 5

**tells you about his rough situation at home, opens up to you just enough**

_ One Saturday afternoon, waiting in their usual spot behind the 7-11, Eddie finally sees Vic approach the curb. He has a black eye, his lip is cut, and he’s walking a little funny. _

_ Eddie usually knows better than to say anything- this is hardly the first time Vic’s shown up hurt- but this looks really bad, and something behind Vic’s eyes is pleading for help. _

_ “Hey, Vic… You okay?” It’s a start. _

_ Vic opens his mouth to shoot Eddie down, but his jaw is sore, and the cut on his lip reminds him what happened last time he talked back. He settles for shaking his head as he sits down. _

_ Eddie hands him the beer he was drinking. “Y’know, I, uh… I won’t say nothin’ to anybody.”  _

_ Vic speaks lower than usual. “My dad’s a fuckin’ drunk, okay?” He can’t look at Eddie, can’t make eye contact, so he settles for looking back and forth between the beer in his hand and the ground. _

_ Eddie’s heart shatters in his chest. He looks at Vic, the most important person in his life behind his father, and feels every blow he’s taken as though they were being dished out to his soul right there.  _

_ “Fuck, Vic. I’m sorry.”  _

_ He finally looks up at Eddie; he finds refuge in his eyes though he’d never admit it. “I’m fine. Just gets rough sometimes, but I can fuckin’ handle it.” _

_ Eddie doesn’t doubt that for a second. Vic is tough. He’s just worried one of these days, his dad will hit him too hard, or send him tumbling down the stairs to never return. Vic can’t know that, though, so he just nods.  _

_ “Yeah.” _


	6. Chapter 6

**calls you every time he gets his ass arrested for some stupid, petty crime**

_ Eddie has a pen in his mouth, debating whether or not to just give up on this math assignment, when his phone rings. _

_ “Yeah?” He figures it’s Vic calling about their plans for later, but when Vic answers, the familiar echo in the background tells Eddie their plans are going to have to wait. _

_ “Hey Eddie.” Vic’s tone is flat, as usual. Unreadable. _

_ “Fuckin’ hell, Vic, are you at the station?” Eddie runs a nervous hand through the mop of blonde curls on his head. _

_ “Yeah. Fuckin’ pigs dragged me in for shoplifting again.” The cop holding Vic’s arm must’ve pulled it, because Vic makes a surprised grunting noise, then laughs. _

_ Eddie sighs. How many times this year will this be now? He’s bailed Vic out every time, and the times he hasn’t been able to cover it himself, he’s asked his father. Joe isn’t always thrilled to be going to the police station, but he always helps Vic out. _

_ “I’ll be down there in a minute. Don’t fuckin’ say anything.” _


	7. Chapter 7

**every time he runs away from home, he runs to you**

_ It’s pouring rain outside, so hard the Cabots’ power is out, and someone is pounding on the door.  _

_ “Eddie, I swear, if this is one of your little friends…” Joe growls. _

_ “I’ve got it, Daddy!” He shuffles down the hall and slips quickly down the stairs to the door, hoping and praying it’s not who he knows it is. _

_ When he swings the door open, it’s Vic, just as expected. He’s sopping wet and holding his arm, and when Eddie looks closer, holy shit, he’s bleeding. _

_ “Daddy, it’s Vic, but it’s an emergency, I’m sorry!” Eddie calls up the stairs as he pulls Vic in by his good arm.  _

_ Vic is calm. He takes his shoes off leisurely and follows Eddie’s frantic footsteps to the downstairs bathroom. _

_ Eddie pulls down the first aid kit and swallows hard. “Show me.” _

_ Vic holds out his arm, and it’s not one, but several cuts. Is that glass? That’s glass.  _

_ Eddie wants to ask what happened, but he knows Vic will tell him if he feels like it, and there’s not a whole lot of time for discussion. He fishes around the box for the tweezers and starts pulling the chunks of- what is this, window? fuck, it’s thick- glass out. _

_ He warns Vic ahead of time, holding the bottle of peroxide up so he can see it. Eddie cleans the wounds, careful to make it hurt as little as possible, and wraps him up tightly. _

_ “Thanks, Eddie.” _

_ They go upstairs to Eddie’s room, and Eddie pulls some dry clothes out of the dresser for Vic. Before long, they’re watching some bad movie on TV, tangled up in one another’s limbs on the bed. _

_ “Vic?” _

_ He turns to face Eddie. _

_ “Your arm...“ _

_ “I’m fine.” _


	8. Chapter 8

**accepts your help with leaving his family behind**

_ They argue about it often. _

_ “You should just move in with me.” _

_ “I’m fine, Eddie. I don’t need your fuckin’ charity.” _

_ Eventually, it gets to be too much. Vic’s pride is among those parts of him hit that night, and when they get to the house after running three red lights and miraculously not getting pulled over, Eddie just pulls him into a hug. _

_ “Shut up,” he pants when Vic tries to mock the open display of feeling. _

_ They sit now on Eddie’s bedroom floor. Vic hasn’t said much since getting to the Cabot house, but then, neither has Eddie. Finally Eddie breaks their weird near-silence. _

_ “You’re moving in here. I don’t wanna fuckin’ hear it about the pity thing. I’m not letting you go back to that hellhole. Got it?” His tone is dead serious and lower than usual.  _

_ Vic almost wants to protest, almost wants to get in one last “I can handle it,” but he knows how bad things have been, and he knows his family won’t miss him. _

_ “Yeah. Okay.” _


	9. Chapter 9

**thanks you when you convince Joe to let him move in**

_ It’s Vic’s first night sleeping in the Cabot house as a resident, and Eddie really put in a lot of work to get him here. How long has Eddie had all those things waiting for Vic? He’s not sure, there’s really no way to know, but the little bundle of toiletries and a blanket surprised Vic. He knew Eddie wanted to help, and he’s seen Eddie help him a million times before, but it still surprises him every time that someone would care for him that way- that someone would care for him at all.  _

_ Normally when he sleeps over, he and Eddie start off a mess of limbs and end up on opposite sides of the bed, but tonight, Eddie won’t let Vic go. He’s usually sort of clingy when he’s sleepy or drunk, but this is a little different. _

_ Vic wakes up a few times in the night (he’s never been such a great sleeper, too used to being woken up by crashing and yelling), and when he does, he finds Eddie holding him close. Even in his sleep, the look on Eddie’s face is one Vic’s not used to- it’s needy, yeah, but it’s also grateful, and relieved.  _

_ Vic’s not one for saying sentimental things, or even really thinking them, but he gets a feeling in his gut that he’s relieved, too. It’s nice to be in a house that’s quiet all night, nice to be somewhere he can relax and not worry about getting beaten on for saying something wrong. It’s also nice just to be with Eddie, and somehow, the knowledge that he’ll be spending all his nights like this, with Eddie, is enough to make him smile. _

_ Eddie stirs in his sleep when Vic moves to stretch his arm, and he wakes a little. He looks up at Vic and smiles lightly, and it’s probably because he’s so damn tired, but Vic looks at Eddie, smiles back, and opens his mouth to speak. _

_ “Thanks for letting me stay here, Eddie.” _

_ “You kidding? Course I did.” _

_ Eddie feels an “I love you” moment creep up on him, but he swallows it down, because he knows how weird Vic gets at the mention of those words. _


	10. Chapter 10

**starts buying (or more likely, stealing) your favorite brand of cigarettes along with his own**

_ Vic and Eddie both have been smokers for a couple years now, and while Eddie likes Chesterfields (and usually buys them), Vic just swipes packs of whatever he can get, though he likes Red Apples the best.  _

_ One summer afternoon, Eddie is sitting on the porch and going through the mail when he sees Vic come up the drive. _

_ In his hand are two packs of cigarettes- the usual Red Apples, and a pack Eddie soon recognizes as Chesterfields. _

_ “Since when do you smoke Chesterfields?” Eddie chuckles. _

_ “I don’t.” Vic tosses the pack to Eddie, who nearly drops the letters in his hands trying to catch it. _

_ “Oh,” he says. “Thank-” Eddie is cut off by the sound of the screen door closing behind Vic, and he shakes his head and smiles to himself as he pulls a cigarette out of the pack.  _


	11. Chapter 11

**though he never seems to pick up on anyone else’s problems, he seems to be in tune to yours, and whenever he notices you’re sad, he pulls some stupid stunt that makes you laugh**

_ The big conference in Vegas is this week, and though Eddie’s been buzzing about it for weeks, he sits on the foot of his bed in a slump. Joe should be calling in an hour or two to let him know he’s at the hotel. _

_ “Hey, Eddie,” Vic says as he walks into the room. He frowns when Eddie doesn’t immediately respond. _

_ Eddie just sits there, head in hand, and sulks.  _

_ Vic isn’t great with reading people. He’s also not great at allowing himself to be read. But for whatever reason, he’s always been able to tell what’s up with Eddie, and today is no exception. _

_ “You okay?” Just because he knows how to read Eddie doesn’t mean he knows what to do with the information. _

_ Eddie looks up at him, brow furrowed. “No.”  _

_ Vic thinks for a second, then pulls a pack of cigarettes from his pocket.  _

_ “Vic, you know we can’t fuckin’ smoke in here. ‘Course Daddy isn’t even fuckin’ home, so who the hell cares? Light the fuck up!” He rolls his eyes and flops back onto the bed. _

_ Vic opens the pack and pulls out one cigarette at a time, putting each new one into his mouth. _

_ Eddie sits up, intrigued. _

_ Vic puts a cigarette up each nostril and one in each ear. In a rare display of silliness, he winks at Eddie. He pulls his lighter from his other pocket and tosses the empty box of cigarettes onto the bed. _

_ “Vic, you’re gonna fuckin’ kill yourself!” Eddie exclaims, eyes wide. He’s stopped sulking though, so Vic continues. _

_ He lights the ones in his mouth first, then the ones in his nose, then the ones in each ear.  _

_ Eddie is laughing now. “Dude, what the fuck? Vic, you’re gonna fuckin’ die!” _

_ Vic takes one breath, then starts coughing. The cigarettes in his nose go shooting to the floor, as do three of the six in his mouth. The one in the left ear falls, but the right one stays put. He pulls the remaining cigarettes out of his face and then blows a giant smoke ring in Eddie’s face. _

_ Eddie scrambles to pick up the lit cigarettes on the floor, which is all the more difficult while laughing as hard as he is. _

_ “Damn it, Vic, the fuck is wrong with you?” _


	12. Chapter 12

**as rough as he is with you, the second you tell him you’re actually uncomfortable, he backs off**

_ Vic slams Eddie against the wall. He kisses him, all teeth, and puts his hands up his shirt. _

_ Eddie grabs at Vic’s back, making little scratch marks along his skin. “Fuck,” he groans as Vic starts grinding against him,  _ hard _. _

_ More biting, more slamming, and Vic is biting into Eddie’s neck.  _

_ “Shit, shit, fuck, Vic, OW! Stop!” Eddie’s arms are sort of flailing and he’s almost surprised with how fast Vic pulls back. _

_ “What, too much?” he asks. He looks a little disheartened, almost disappointed in himself. _

_ “Little bit. You’ve got blood on your mouth, Vic. I’m fuckin’ bleeding.” Eddie is almost comically calm about it, but it makes sense when the amount of times this has happened is considered.  _

_ “Shit, sorry Eddie.” _

_ “It’s okay, just… Ahh, fuck. That hurt. Just be a little more gentle?” Eddie puts a hand to his neck to check the bleeding, relieved to see how little is coming out.  _

_ “I can do that,” Vic breathes, and crushes his lips against Eddie’s. _


	13. Chapter 13

  **makes sure to roll you onto your side when you get so depressed and drunk that you black out**

_ Occasionally, after fights with Joe or mistakes made, Eddie will slip into a depression. He binge drinks and sulks and sometimes eats his weight in candy, and for those nights only, Vic takes on the role of caretaker, in the loosest possible sense of the word. _

_ Eddie’s been drinking hard liquor for two hours now, moving between the bottle and a small stack of chocolate bars he somehow manages to keep hidden from Vic. He’s on the floor of their bedroom, three steps from crying again, and Vic is sitting across the room, watching TV. He knows Eddie likes his space when he gets like this, and at the same time, Vic doesn’t know what to do with all that emotion.  _

_ Eventually, Vic hears a low  _ thump!  _ from across the room, and that’s his cue to go over there.  _

_ He could try to lift Eddie, but that doesn’t always work. He’s definitely unconscious though, Vic notices, so he pushes the candy away and rolls Eddie over onto his side. There’s an unsightly halo of chocolate around his mouth, and one candy bar left in his hand, so Vic takes the half-eaten bar and puts it aside. He moves to wipe Eddie’s mouth a little and gets most of the chocolate.  _

_ Vic walks back over to the TV and turns the volume up a little, then moves as close to Eddie as he can while still in view of the television.  _

_ It’s another all-nighter, but why not? Looks like there’s a marathon of monster movies on all night, so really, he’d be up anyway. Watching over Eddie is just a side-effect of staying up to watch the movies. _

_ Right. _

  
  



	14. Chapter 14

**comes along with you to your first apartment and keeps you warm the night the furnace breaks**

_ Vic and Eddie have lived in this little apartment for a few months now, and though California isn’t exactly the North Pole, this winter has been pretty cold.  _

_ It’s 36 degrees the night the building’s furnace decides to die. Eddie spends most of the evening complaining, and when it’s time to go to bed, he’s in two layers and a hat. _

_ Vic makes a joke about his overreaction, but he sort of gets it. His plan to stay warm, however, is a little bit different. _

_ Getting Eddie out of those layers isn’t easy, but he does, and when they’ve finished rolling around, Vic holds onto Eddie tightly.  _

_ Eddie’s so comfortable, he doesn’t even ask to get up and dress.  _


	15. Chapter 15

**wraps himself around you, sometimes even while you’re busy on the phone for work**

_ “I don’t care what she said, you still owe me the money from last month. I’m gonna be generous and give you another week, but if I keep going around giving out extensions, I’m never gonna get paid. You understand?” Eddie has been on the phone going on an hour now, flipping through his little black book and calling almost everyone in it.  _

_ Vic is used to days like this. Eddie usually spends a whole morning this way, sometimes two a week.  _

_ Today, Vic is bored. He has nothing to do, there’s nothing on TV, and he’s already eaten what was left of the snacks in the house. He walks into the living room where he can hear Eddie yapping into the phone and smirks. _

_ “You heard what I said, I can’t-” Eddie stops short as Vic’s arms wrap around him from behind and he feels Vic’s warm breath on the back of his neck. He struggles to continue his phone call. _

_ Vic nips at his neck, and soon Eddie is very quickly trying to end the call.  _

_ “Yeah. Yeah. I’ll call you about it tomorrow morning. What? Oh, I didn’t realize tomorrow was Sunday. Monday then. Okay. Bye.” He turns around to look at Vic once he puts the phone down. “You son of a bitch… I’m gonna get you for that,” Eddie giggles. He grabs Vic by the collar and pushes him down onto the sofa. _


	16. Chapter 16

**tries to understand the business things you’re talking about**

_ “So we have to move the money through three different places in order to make it seem legit,” Eddie says. He’s been explaining to Vic why they can’t just take the money from the last big job and spend it now for the past twenty minutes. _

_ “I don’t get it. What, can they track the money or some shit?” Vic frowns. _

_ “No. Well, sort of. It’s also because it’s pretty fuckin’ suspicious to spend a million dollars Wednesday when a million’s worth of diamonds were stolen on Tuesday.” Eddie takes another piece of pizza from the box on the table and sighs. “Don’t worry about it, Toothpick. We’re covered.” _

_ Vic thinks for a moment, chewing his bottom lip. “I think I’m starting to get it. You gotta bring the money in from other places to make it look like they’re paying us for legit business?” _

_ Eddie smiles and nods. “Yeah,” he says around a mouthful of pizza. “Exactly.” _


	17. Chapter 17

**reminds you to take a break from work every now and again (even if his way of doing that is taking your phone and hiding it)**

_ This week has been crazy. Eddie’s been so swamped with work, he and Vic have hardly said a word to each other. _

_ Vic wakes up a little early that Friday morning, and, knowing Eddie will be up in twenty minutes to make another endless string of vaguely threatening phone calls, he seizes his opportunity. _

_ He walks into the living room and picks Eddie’s phone up off the table. Nonchalantly, he walks over to the laundry hamper and drops the phone into it.  _

_ Vic climbs back into bed and enjoys the last few minutes of peace he’ll have for a while. _

 


	18. Chapter 18

**glares at anyone who even thinks about hitting on you**

_ Vic’s not one to tell Eddie in so many words how he feels. Eddie’s always gotten by on watching Vic’s actions, feeling Vic’s arms wrap around him, and noticing the little things he picks up from Eddie.  _

_ That being said, Vic is possessive.  _

_ Very possessive. _

_ Should anyone, male or female, look at Eddie just a little too long or a little too sweetly for Vic’s liking, he shoots a look back so sharp it could cut glass. _

_ They’re in a bar somewhere, celebrating some business thing Vic only sort of understands. Eddie is on his third drink; Vic isn’t counting. A tall, broad-shouldered man in glasses and a nice suit sits down at the bar next to Eddie.  _

_ Vic isn’t talking to him at the moment, preferring to smoke a cigarette and enjoy the glass of whiskey in his hand, but the second he hears it, his attention shifts. _

_ “Hi, anyone sitting here?” Seems innocent enough, but Vic isn’t convinced. _

_ “No,” Eddie replies. “Go ahead.” _

_ “Thanks.” A pause. “Don’t tell me you’re here alone.” _

_ That’s all the information Vic needs. _

_ “He’s not,” Vic growls, cigarette glowing in the dim light of the bar. _

_ The man jumps at Vic’s sudden response. “Oh, uhh…” _

_ Eddie feels a warmth in his stomach. He likes to be wanted, and the rare display of commitment (or whatever Vic’s version of commitment is) is welcome. _

_ “Yeah, I’m not alone,” Eddie says. He feels Vic scoot closer to him and has to fight the smile forming on his face. _

_ “I see. Sorry about that…” The guy is visibly nervous, and Vic can’t help but smile as he walks away. _

 


	19. Chapter 19

**occasionally lets you win at pool**

_ In the back of Eddie’s favorite bar, there’s a room with a pool table. Every time they go, they end up in that back room, and most every time they play, Vic wipes the floor with Eddie. _

_ But sometimes, occasionally, Eddie’s eyes will be extra sad and blue, or his hair will be just fluffy enough, or he’ll smile that way Vic will never admit hits him right in the chest, and Vic takes a dive. _

_ It’s never when there’s any money at stake- then Eddie would never shut up about it.  _

_ One night they’re back there, the room filled with wispy clouds of cigarette smoke, and Eddie goes to take his shot. He’s shit at pool, he’s got to know that by now, but he’s still trying his best. He furrows his brow and sticks out his tongue just a little, and Vic almost catches himself smiling at it.  _

_ “Ah, fuck. So close! I was that fuckin’ close!” Eddie says, and the light from the lamp filters through the haze of smoke just right, and his eyes light up. They’re full of stupid hope that he has a shot at winning, and for some reason Vic doesn’t want to consider, he’s about to let Eddie have that shot. _

_ Vic goes to take his turn, and it’s almost obvious the way he makes a phony slip-up. He hits the ball wrong and it misses every other ball on the table. _

_ “Shit, Vic, you must be drunker than I thought if you’re shooting that fuckin’ bad!” Eddie laughs. _

_ Vic just shrugs and shakes his head. “Must be.” _


	20. Chapter 20

**he may tease you constantly, but if anyone else says anything even remotely negative about you, he jumps on them like a tiger**

_ They’re sitting in some restaurant shooting the shit with one of Joe’s old buddies. Joe’s up making a phone call, or maybe using the bathroom, Vic wasn’t paying attention. _

_ This guy’s known Eddie since he was a kid. He and Joe are chummy, but something about him makes Vic uncomfortable. He keeps talking to Eddie like he’s better than him, using this smug tone like he’s hot shit and he knows it.  _

_ Eddie is starting to get a little uneasy, and then it happens. _

_ “You know, kiddo, I remember when you were this big.” He holds his hand up a few feet off the ground. “Now you’re much bigger. Ever think of laying off the French fries?” The guy starts into a fit of laughter, pounding the table. _

_ Eddie tries a fake laugh, but any fool with eyes could see the poor guy’s insulted. That’s one thing Vic knows to stay away from- the weight. As much as he can get away with teasing Eddie, even Vic knows better than to go for that one. _

_ While Eddie is trying to laugh it off, trying to play down his insecurities, Vic jumps straight to pissed off. He puts his drink down a little too forcefully, and the jackass looks up. _

_ “The fuck’s the matter with you?” Vic grunts.  _

_ Joe’s friend is still laughing. “Oh, come on, like you haven’t noticed he’s getting a bit on the blimpy side! You’ve known him a while too, right?” _

_ It’s like this guy wants to be punched in the teeth. Vic has to remember not to really beat this guy up- he doesn’t want to upset Joseph, after all. _

_ “You think you’re one to fuckin’ talk? Look at yourself, you’ve lost all your fuckin’ hair and you’ve got a big-ass fuckin’ nose!” Vic spits.  _

_ Eddie’s got a hand on Vic’s leg under the table now, worried he’ll stand up and fight. _

_ “Jeez, all right, sorry.” The man backs down, frightened. “Sorry, Eddie.” _

_ Eddie gives a stifled little laugh. “It’s fine, man.” _


	21. Chapter 21

**when he gets caught at the warehouse, he doesn’t say a single word, even though saying Joe’s name (or yours) would give him an instant pass**

_ “Come on, just tell us who you’re working for and you’ll walk. That’s all you have to do. Immunity. Total immunity will be granted to you if you’ll just tell us whose warehouse you were in. Whose shit was it?” The cop grilling him is getting himself all worked up over nothing. Vic won’t talk. _

_ He hasn’t the past three days. _

_ Vic just sits there, stoic and silent. Does he want to go free? Of course. Does he realize the weight of what’s going on? For the first time in his life, yes. Is he going to answer? _

_ Nope. _

_ “Fuck, you’re screwing yourself, pal,” the cop says, flustered. “Enjoy your stay in prison.” _

_ “I will,” Vic says, and it’s the first thing he’s said all day. _


	22. Chapter 22

**maintains his silence for four years**

_ Even in prison, they ask. They pester. They keep offering him deals. _

_ “You’ll be let out today if you just tell us who you were working for.” _

_ “We’ll let you go tomorrow morning if you talk.” _

_ “A year on a seven year charge! Come on! Don’t you want to go home?” _

_ Vic never bites. _

_ Sometimes he wants to, when things get especially hard. He just wants to go home. _

_ Thing is, that train of thought gets blown up fast the second he remembers what home is- Eddie. _

_ Vic has nothing without Eddie. He’s lived with him as long as he can remember, and he may not be the first to admit it, but he knows he can’t really function on his own.  _

_ He could talk and go free tomorrow, but he couldn’t go home, and all he wants is to go home.  _

_ God, he misses his home. _

 


	23. Chapter 23

**thinks about you every day of his sentence, and though he can’t write or call, he gets your packages and secretly wishes he could thank you**

_ It’s amazing, Vic thinks, what prison can do to you. _

_ He’s never been a big talker, never been one for pouring feelings into long sentences or expressing himself beyond the bare minimum to get by. Lately, though, and maybe it’s just the buildup, he’s been craving conversation. _

_ He talks here and there to his low-life cellmate, or occasionally to other cons in the yard, but he misses being able to actually talk to someone. _

_ Maybe he misses listening, he soon realizes. He misses listening to Eddie talk. Some mornings he wakes up with Eddie’s voice ringing in his ears, saying something about the business or the bar he wants to go to or, on occasion, that he loves Vic.  _

_ Vic doesn’t think too much about that. _

_ Occasionally Vic will get a package, always addressed from some girl, and the moment he opens them, he sees the Milky Ways and the blocky handwriting on the letter and knows it’s Eddie. _

_ One day is particularly bad, and while his cellmate is out, Vic pulls the letter back out and reads over the last couple words again. _

LOVE ALWAYS.

_ He feels something in his stomach, a weird feeling he’s only felt once or twice before, and tries to laugh it off. It comes out as a strange, choked sound, so he just coughs and looks back at the words. _

_ Vic goes to toss the letter back in his pile of notes when he notices the back. The print is much smaller, but it’s still undoubtedly in Eddie’s hand. _

I KNOW IT DOESN’T HELP MUCH, AND I KNOW YOU DON’T WANT ME TO GET MUSHY, BUT I HAVEN’T BEEN WITH ANYBODY SINCE YOU LEFT.

IT’S STUPID. I DON’T KNOW WHY I SAID IT.

I JUST MISS YOU. PLEASE DON’T FORGET ME.

_ Fuck. _

_ Vic spends the next twenty seconds not knowing what to do with himself or the letter, and the thought of Eddie saying those words haunts him for the rest of his sentence. _


	24. Chapter 24

**once, on a particularly lonely day when his cellmate is in the library, he draws a little picture of you almost without realizing**

_ Vic can’t write Eddie, but he’s never been much for writing anyway. He does doodle sometimes though, little cartoons here and there that don’t matter to him. It mostly happens when he zones out as a sort of escape. _

_ He’s alone in his cell, his mind is wandering, and he picks up his pencil and starts to draw. It’s just a little thing in the corner of the paper, but when he finally looks at it with clear eyes, he’s startled. _

_ It’s Eddie. It’s a little, cartoon Eddie. _

_ How the hell did that happen?  _

_ He doesn’t throw it away though, just tucks it underneath the small pile of papers and letters he has. _


	25. Chapter 25

**doesn’t get upset that you don’t pick him up- what matters is that you’re here now**

_ Eddie doesn’t pick Vic up like he wanted.  _

_ He meant to, he did, but work got in the way, and that nagging fear that Vic no longer feels the same is still sitting in his chest where it hit him the night before. _

_ But when he does finally see Vic, slumped in a chair in Joe’s office nursing a Remy Martin, and their eyes meet, Eddie can feel everything falling back into place. _

_ Vic thought he was upset over Eddie not coming to get him, but it all just falls away when he actually sees him. _

_ Holy shit. The face he’s been seeing in his head for four years, the only person he wanted to talk to, has ever wanted to talk to, is finally  _ there _ , in front of him. _

_ Now Vic is home. _


	26. Chapter 26

**gives you his first real hug in four years, not to mention his first genuine smile**

_ Eddie immediately goes in for the hug. How could he not? He rushes up to Vic and pulls him in close, kisses him on the cheek (so what if Joe sees?), looks him over. He still looks great, not too much worse for the wear on his face, which is smiling wider than Eddie’s seen in years. _

_ Vic can hardly breathe. It’s the most overwhelming thing he’s felt since he used to fear his drunken father. His chest feels like it’s going to explode, and when Eddie kisses his cheek, he finally feels like he’s back. That brought him home. _

_ Eddie spends the next few minutes (after their little wrestling match) trying to set Vic up with a job. He’s still the same old Eddie, always looking after Vic, always looking at Vic… His eyes are so much bluer than Vic had remembered. Since when is he this sentimental? Vic tries to stifle it, but it shows on his face.  _

_ He just missed Eddie so damn much. He’s felt so weird since he left prison, but this right here feels like the most normal thing in the world. _

_ Eddie still feels like home. _


	27. Chapter 27

**tries his best to get back to normal, even if he doesn’t totally know what that is**

_ The first week is weird. He gets himself out of the halfway house (or rather, Eddie gets him out), but he can’t really go back to their apartment. _

_ He has to get a place by himself. It’s just not safe the other way, not yet.  _

_ So Eddie, true to form, helps him in every way he still can. He helps Vic find a place that’s not too expensive, helps him move some things in, helps him get some groceries. _

_ “You’re still shit at buying groceries,” Eddie laughs. “It’s a good thing you’ve got me around to save your ass.” _

_ Oh, Vic catches himself thinking, he has no idea how right he is. _


	28. Chapter 28

**actually mumbles a “thank you” for the liquor you bring him, even though he shuffles into his room to finish it alone**

_ Vic doesn’t feel right. He thought he’d feel better after a week or two, but he still doesn’t quite feel like himself.  _

_ He can recognize something’s off. He just isn’t great at figuring out what it is, or why, or how to make it better. _

_ Eddie does though. Eddie can tell his patience is totally gone, his boundaries are weird, and his sense of humor is, somehow, darker. _

_ He tries to help Vic any way he can, but his usual methods are often shot down. Vic is uncomfortable most of the time with physical contact he doesn’t initiate, and though it breaks Eddie’s heart, he gets it.  _

_ He also doesn’t pry, which Vic would be very thankful for, if he realized what’s going on. _

_ So Eddie goes with another thing that used to help- Crown Royal. Vic loves to drink, and maybe if they drink together, they can knock down some of Vic’s walls. _

_ They don’t, though.  _

_ Vic almost looks like he’s coming back for a second, but then the walls go right back up, twice as thick. He growls at Eddie, wants to be left alone. _

_ As he’s making his way into the bedroom to drink himself blind alone, he turns to look at Eddie. _

_ “Thanks,” he mutters, and closes the door behind him. _


	29. Chapter 29

**comes out, drunk and sad, and wraps himself around you, just like old times, and kisses you all over**

_ Two hours later and Eddie is sitting on the couch watching  _ Baywatch _. He hears the turn of the doorknob and, like a fool, feels his heart leap. He’s kicking himself for being an idiot when Vic comes out and starts to walk over. _

_ He’s very drunk, unsteady on his feet, and Eddie gets up to catch him, just in case. _

_ Vic starts to mumble out an apology and Eddie wants to cry.  _

_ “I’m a fuckin’ asshole,” Vic grumbles. He closes the gap between them and holds Eddie close. _

_ It may have taken the liquor to remember, but Vic was reminded that Eddie is his anchor, his tie to reality. It’s hard to remember it sometimes with all the other discomforts buzzing through his head, but the alcohol was enough to numb most of that. _

_ They stand there for a bit, Vic apologizing in his usual way of a few drunken words and Eddie trying to convince him everything is okay. Somewhere between “it’s okay” and “I get it,” Vic starts kissing Eddie. _

_ He moves somewhat sloppily along Eddie’s jaw and down to his neck, and it takes all of Eddie’s strength not to go to pieces right there. _

 


	30. Chapter 30

**jumps on you in the car before you go to breakfast to remind you that he is, in fact, still into you**

_ When Eddie comes by to get Vic almost a half hour early, Vic gets the message. He gets the message immediately, and it makes him so happy, he comes out to the car with a smile on his face. _

_ It takes him all of sixty seconds to pounce on Eddie, kissing him and biting him and almost slamming him against the window.  _

_ He’s feeling good, finally getting closer to normal. Vic is so comfortable, he’s the one pulling the car seat back for once.  _

_ It’s like Vic can see his usual self on the horizon, and Eddie is a freight train taking him there. _


	31. Chapter 31

**calls you immediately with the situation of the job, and though he doesn’t sound panicked at all, you can tell he’s aware he’s screwed it all up**

_ So maybe Vic isn’t as close to normal as he thought. _

_ His patience didn’t just run out during the job, it simply didn’t show up. Those idiots pulled the alarm, and like a reflex, Vic pulled his gun. _

_ If he thinks about it, he’s sure he’ll see it’s because of a fear of going back to prison, an inner panic so loud, he can hear it in his sleep. _

_ He doesn’t think about it. _

_ The minute he makes it out of there, gun still hot, he drives somewhere he can call Eddie. The cop in his trunk stopped screaming, so he figures he can hit the drive-thru on his way to make the call. _

_ Eddie’s not thrilled, but Vic didn’t think he would be. Somehow, he keeps his patience with Vic. _

_ “What do you mean you took a cop- okay. Okay. Did you get the diamonds?” Eddie’s voice is shaking. _

_ “No.” _

_ A sharp exhale into the phone. “Did you see if anyone did?” _

_ “No.” _

_ “So let me get this straight, they pulled the fuckin’ alarm?” Eddie’s voice moves up in pitch with each word.  _

_ “Yeah. Stupid motherfuckers,” Vic mumbles. _

_ “And so everybody started shooting?”  _

_ “Yeah, and then the fuckin’ cops showed up, so I got the fuck outta there. Had to take one of those little piggies with me just to get out.” Vic, as usual, is surprisingly cool through all this. _

_ “Fuck… I’m gonna talk to Daddy, okay? Go to the warehouse and make absolutely fuckin’ sure nobody leaves. We gotta find out if someone got the diamonds.” Vic can’t see it, but he imagines Eddie running his hand through his hair as he speaks. _

_ “Okay.” _

_ “See you at the rendezvous. Be safe, you hear me?” Eddie says. _

_ “Yeah.” _


	32. Chapter 32

**in his final seconds, thinks of you- not so much in a romantic way, but more… “shit, Eddie is gonna come back any minute and find me like this.”**

_ Vic’s surprise doesn’t last too long after the bullets hit him, but then, nothing does. The world is spinning and he’s falling fast. _

_ He hits the ground, seconds left, and after the thought about what a bastard Orange is, Eddie waltzes into his mind, as he’s made a habit of doing. _

_ Vic realizes Eddie is on his way back now, that he’ll be the one to find him here. For the first time, he really thinks about Eddie’s feelings, and he’s sure it’s just the loss of blood. _

_ Eddie will find him dead, Vic thinks, and Eddie will break down. That he knows. The years of seeing Eddie’s heartbroken face at bruises and cuts from his father have taught Vic that Eddie hates seeing him hurt. _

_ Vic doesn’t always understand the way their relationship works, or the way Eddie’s feelings work, or even the way his own feelings for Eddie work, but one thing he’s always known is that Eddie is important to him. _

_ Eddie is so important, Vic’s glad he won’t be able to see the look on Eddie’s face when he finds him.  _

_ Poor Eddie.  _


End file.
